When having options is the enemy of finding purpose
Do you feel stuck in life? Like you know there is more you have to give, your potential is not being utilized or appreciated, and you desperately want to find your purpose in life, but you just can’t figure out what you should do? I bet you are sick of people asking, “if you could do anything, what would it be?” Because that is exactly the problem???
Whelp, you may just be suffering exactly because you have so many options.
Choice overload, or the paradox of choice, happens when we struggle to make a decision because we have too many choices: The more variety, the harder it is to choose, and it makes us less likely to make a choice because the experience is overwhelming. Sound familiar?
Don’t stab your eye with a sharp stick, try these things instead:
Reduce your options. What kind of personal limits can you place on the choices to trim them down? Sure, you could be good at anything you put your mind to, but what if you start to narrow down your options based on the time you want to spend, your values, your interests, the skills you already have.
Time constraints. E.g. Do you want to take the time to go back to school and earn a degree?
What are you good at already, what skills do you already have?
What do your values direct you toward? What brings you moments of purpose, interest, and flow already?
What do you do when you don’t have to do anything? What do you find endlessly interesting, or enjoyable?
Who, or what causes do you feel passionate about supporting?
Don’t force yourself to commit to just 1 best choice, forever.
Stop trying to figure it all out in your head and start taking action. Research has shown that when we make choices based on wanting to explore the experience vs. making the best choice possible, it increases the ease with which we choose. Remove the pressure of choosing the absolute best choice, and try on different options for yourself based on just experiencing them, checking them out and trying them on to see if they fit. In doing so, you will very likely find the thing you want to dedicate your time to… for now.
It’s true that you could do so many things with your life, and how lucky are you? But, if all the options are keeping you stuck in paralysis it’s not doing you any good to keep treading water (and it is so painful to feel stuck here!).
The short answer is, there likely isn’t a perfect choice to be made, but you can narrow it down to be a good choice among many, and the real magic lies in what you do after you have made the choice.
Committing to something and pursuing your goals is where your purpose and meaning lies. (Throw out the rest of this post! The answer lies here.)
So get to taking action and making a choice! It doesn’t have to be the best choice ever, nor does it have to be the only choice forevermore. It just needs to be a pretty good choice for you, and one you feel energized to commit to for now.
Still feeling stuck in analysis paralysis? Coaching can help. I have spots available.