Mindset Memo #2

“Why are other people’s goals at the top of your to-do list?”

Years ago, when I was a sad, miserable employee, I came across this quote and it was exactly what I needed. It put my misery in perspective, but more importantly, it gave me a way to take my power and my life back. I WAS spending all my time working for someone and putting their needs and goals at the top of my to do list… which left me with nothing for myself at the end of the day. 

For years I had been such a good employee, going the extra mile, bending over backwards to accommodate my job, and at first it felt good. I got a lot of purpose and meaning from putting my non-profit job first, and doing things for other people was so much easier than doing things for myself, plus I got a lot of praise and appreciation for all my efforts! Fast forward 10 years later, I’m underpaid, burnt out, stagnant in my career, and my growth and learning (which is a top value for me), bored, and resentful of the years I have dedicated to my job with “nothing” to show for it. 

And then I read that tiny, insignificant idea: WHY are other people’s goals at the top of your list? Reading that sentence both helped me take responsibility that I was CHOOSING to put other’s needs before my own, AND it gave me back a sense of control and options. I did not have to continue to be in this position. If I could choose to put other people’s goals at the top of my to-do list, (and do good work for them) well dangnabbit, I could CHOOSE to put my own at the top and do the same good work for myself and my dreams! 

Plus it gave me some added fire in my belly too! Whenever I was feeling defeated, or listless, returning to this question was a reminder that I could, and would, choose to intentionally put my own goals at the top of my to-do list and continue making the changes I needed to move forward and change my situation. I had the power, and the motivation to stop putting my life on hold for other people’s goals.